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The type of attitude you possess depends entirely on you. It can be either positive or negative. The great thing is – you get to choose. No one can make you feel a particular way because you must remember you are in control of how you choose to feel. When someone does or says something that you feel was meant to hurt you, that may or may not have been their intent. Oftentimes, hurt feelings are simply a matter of misunderstanding. Even if the person’s intent was malicious, you can simply choose not to let this affect you.

One of my favorite movies is The Point of No Return starring Bridget Fonda, Gabriel Byrne, and Anne Bancroft. The movie is basically a remake of La Femme Nikita and Bridget Fonda’s character, Maggie, is a lawbreaking criminal who has chosen to become a paid assassin over death by lethal injection. She is very rough around the edges so as part of her training she receives etiquette lessons. Her transformation is nothing short of remarkable. In one scene, her coach for this endeavor, played by Anne Bancroft, gives her a tip on how to control her temper. She tells her that when something bad happens or a situation goes awry to simple smile and say something like,

"I never did mind about the little things".

This is one of my favorite movie quotes and I use it quite often. It helps me to put things into perspective.

In the past, I used to let little things drive me crazy, and I must admit that sometimes I still do. The difference is, now when I feel that happening, I try to make a conscious effort to choose a positive attitude.

There is much to be gained from having a positive attitude. Studies have shown that a positive attitude promotes better health. Projecting positivity helps with handling stress and we all know that our health is directly linked to how we cope with stress.

A positive attitude is a foundation you can build upon. It would be quite difficult to be confident, outgoing, and enthusiastic without first having a positive attitude. A positive attitude supports positive attributes; a negative attitude does not. It’s pretty obvious why positive people have more friends than negative people. If you first choose a positive attitude, other positives will follow.

In today’s fast paced, high tech society, we are bombarded with information. Many of us are experiencing information overload. Between e-mails, snail mail, text mail, billboards, newspapers, and magazines, advertisers are all competing for our attention. Then there’s the news, which is almost always negative. Thousands of positive things occur every single day, but the media focuses on sharing mostly bad stuff.

So how do you stay positive amidst so much negativity? For starters, you can limit your news intake and consider your news sources very carefully. Next, do things that make you happy. Watch funny movies, listen to your favorite music, spend time with people whose company you enjoy, or pursue a hobby.

One of the easiest and best things you can do to keep a positive attitude is to think about everything in your life for which you are grateful. If you have a roof over your head, a bed to sleep in, food to eat, and are wearing clothing, then you should be grateful. If you are able to read this message then you have the gift of sight and you should be grateful. If someone is reading this to you, then you have the gift of hearing and again, you should be grateful. If you are reading this on a computer that you own, then by most of the world’s standards you are quite wealthy and you should be grateful.

We take so many things for granted and in doing so we allow negativity to creep in to our lives. If you start paying attention to the gifts you already have and begin each day by giving thanks, it’s easy to have a positive attitude.

Have you ever noticed how two people can witness an event and have a completely different account of what occurred? Whether it’s an automobile accident or an TV interview, people often tell a completely different story of what they both witnessed.  I believe the reason for this has to do with where they place their attention or focus.

Perhaps the best example of this is when people have serious arguments.  We all know there are always two sides to every story.  A long time ago, I had two very good friends, who got into a serious disagreement about something.  I honestly can’t remember what the issue was but they both had completely different versions of the same story.  How could this be?  Was one of them deliberately lying?  Although this may have been the case, I seriously doubt it, as I knew the character of both individuals quite well.  It was most likely a matter of perspective.  In other words, what aspect of the story they were giving their focus to?  As Dr. Phil once remarked with his Southern drawl, “Like my Daddy always said – no matter how thin you make a pancake it still has two sides!”

Nobody is better at redirecting our focus than politicians.  I believe both parties want what’s best for the country but they simply have different ideas of how to accomplish this.  In an effort to gain our vote they skillfully redirect our focus with their carefully chosen words.

The Democrats make statements like, “The Republicans want to give tax cuts to the wealthiest 1% of individuals.” Although that may be a true statement, a more accurate statement would go like this, “The Republicans want to give tax cuts to everyone across the board.” By focusing solely on the words “the wealthiest 1%”, it makes one think that Republicans are only looking out for the rich which simply isn’t true.  By providing tax cuts to everyone, businesses can thrive which will create more jobs for everyone.

The Republicans make statements like, “The Democrats want to give more handouts in the form of welfare.” This too is an oversimplified statement.  I believe it would be more accurate to say, “The Democrats want to provide welfare assistance in instances where it is truly needed.”

I’ve probably just succeeded in pissing off every single person who reads this since it appears that I’ve made a derogatory remark about each party.  However, that was not my intent. I was trying to illustrate how shifting your focus changes your perspective.

Let me ask you a question: which of those statements really caught your attention?  What was your reaction?  You most likely focused on the statement that made your party look bad and it may have made you a little bit angry.

Many of our reactions and observations are based on having this narrow, tunnel-vision focus.  It’s kind of like when political figures have their own agenda and they see what they want to see.  They also want us to share this somewhat distorted vision.  When we step back and look at the whole picture, we gain a better perspective. This leads to better understanding and better communications.

How can you use perspective to your advantage?  Begin by focusing on all that is good in your life.  Notice the things that you want to change and begin making a serious effort to do so.  However, in this case you want to use selective focus by keeping your attention only on the good.  Take inventory of everything you have going for you.  This will be your proverbial glass.  Now instead of seeing the glass as half empty, see it as half full, but don’t stop there.  Try to keep filling the glass with more wonderful things.  As you begin to change the things you don’t like, soon your glass will be overflowing!