The other day I had the pleasure of watching a local pet costume contest.  There were literally hundreds of animals including cats, a ferret, a cockatoo, an iguana, and a hamster to name a few.  They were all incredibly adorable and these are just a few of the charming pets who participated.

Have you ever noticed how two people can witness an event and have a completely different account of what occurred? Whether it’s an automobile accident or an TV interview, people often tell a completely different story of what they both witnessed.  I believe the reason for this has to do with where they place their attention or focus.

Perhaps the best example of this is when people have serious arguments.  We all know there are always two sides to every story.  A long time ago, I had two very good friends, who got into a serious disagreement about something.  I honestly can’t remember what the issue was but they both had completely different versions of the same story.  How could this be?  Was one of them deliberately lying?  Although this may have been the case, I seriously doubt it, as I knew the character of both individuals quite well.  It was most likely a matter of perspective.  In other words, what aspect of the story they were giving their focus to?  As Dr. Phil once remarked with his Southern drawl, “Like my Daddy always said – no matter how thin you make a pancake it still has two sides!”

Nobody is better at redirecting our focus than politicians.  I believe both parties want what’s best for the country but they simply have different ideas of how to accomplish this.  In an effort to gain our vote they skillfully redirect our focus with their carefully chosen words.

The Democrats make statements like, “The Republicans want to give tax cuts to the wealthiest 1% of individuals.” Although that may be a true statement, a more accurate statement would go like this, “The Republicans want to give tax cuts to everyone across the board.” By focusing solely on the words “the wealthiest 1%”, it makes one think that Republicans are only looking out for the rich which simply isn’t true.  By providing tax cuts to everyone, businesses can thrive which will create more jobs for everyone.

The Republicans make statements like, “The Democrats want to give more handouts in the form of welfare.” This too is an oversimplified statement.  I believe it would be more accurate to say, “The Democrats want to provide welfare assistance in instances where it is truly needed.”

I’ve probably just succeeded in pissing off every single person who reads this since it appears that I’ve made a derogatory remark about each party.  However, that was not my intent. I was trying to illustrate how shifting your focus changes your perspective.

Let me ask you a question: which of those statements really caught your attention?  What was your reaction?  You most likely focused on the statement that made your party look bad and it may have made you a little bit angry.

Many of our reactions and observations are based on having this narrow, tunnel-vision focus.  It’s kind of like when political figures have their own agenda and they see what they want to see.  They also want us to share this somewhat distorted vision.  When we step back and look at the whole picture, we gain a better perspective. This leads to better understanding and better communications.

How can you use perspective to your advantage?  Begin by focusing on all that is good in your life.  Notice the things that you want to change and begin making a serious effort to do so.  However, in this case you want to use selective focus by keeping your attention only on the good.  Take inventory of everything you have going for you.  This will be your proverbial glass.  Now instead of seeing the glass as half empty, see it as half full, but don’t stop there.  Try to keep filling the glass with more wonderful things.  As you begin to change the things you don’t like, soon your glass will be overflowing! 

Are you directing your life or is your life directing you? Can you imagine listening to a symphony orchestra without a conductor? Everything would be disharmonious. The same is true of our lives; they need direction. It’s no secret that most people spend more time planning their wedding or their vacation that they do their lives. Why do most people leave their whole lives to chance? My guess is that they become stuck in a routine that simply becomes a habit.

I’ve known a good many people who end up in situations and wonder how they got there. It’s as if they make no correlation to their circumstances and their previous actions. For the most part, wherever you are in your life is a result of every decision you’ve ever made up to this point. Certainly, there are unforeseen circumstances from time to time but that’s not what I’m referring to. I’m talking about the decisions you make on a daily basis. A habit is nothing more than a decision that’s made regularly.
If you light up a cigarette, you are making a decision. If you gorge on potato chips, you are making a decision. If watch TV for hours and don’t get any exercise, you are making a decision. If you never take the time to relax, you are making a decision. If you spend money you don’t have, you are making a decision. The trouble is, a lot of people forget that they are making decisions because they’re functioning on auto pilot.

A great way to break a bad habit is to replace it with a good one. If you think of your life as something that you can create then you will immediately begin to notice which habits are bringing you the things you desire and which ones are not. I’m sure you’ve probably heard the definition of insanity. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

The process of living with purpose and creating the life you desire can be distilled to 4 easy steps.

1.   Take inventory of your life. Are you getting the results you want?

2.   Write down all the things you’d like to have or accomplish. Take your time with this. Maybe you’ve never even stopped to think about what it is you really want.

3.   If you haven’t made a vision board now would be a great time to do this. For a vision board to be effective, you must review it every day. This is an effective way to communicate your desires to your subconscious. Since your subconscious wants you to be happy, it will do it’s best to deliver.

4.   You will now become more aware of your actions and decisions and how they affect the ability to achieve your dreams. Make a conscious effort to monitor your actions and ask yourself if they are in alignment with the things you want.

Once you become fully aware of this process, you can begin living a purposeful life. Living purposefully is like having a conductor for your music. You are the maestro. Now go and orchestrate the symphony of your life!

For those of you who haven’t seen the movie Pay it Forward, here’s a short clip.  It’s a great example of putting forth positivity into the world.

What can self-improvement do for you?  In a word, everything.  It can make you more positive, less fearful, and more knowledgeable.  All of which will not only make you more interesting, but also more enjoyable to be around. Because you will begin utilizing more of your potential, you will feel more alive and happier with who you are.

The fact that you’re reading this leads me to believe that you’re already someone who knows why self-improvement is important or you’ve at least given it some thought.

What do people mean when they talk about self-improvement?  To me, it’s anything you do that improves your mind, your body, and your spirit with the greatest emphasis being on the mind.  If you begin by filling your mind with only the best thoughts and the best information, then it will be a natural progression to want to improve the body and spirit as well.

There are so many reasons to want to improve one’s self.

Improving your mind can assist you in:

• Developing better relationships
• Being happier with yourself
• Becoming a better communicator
• Developing better career skills

Improving your body can assist you in:

• Looking more attractive
• Feeling more youthful and vibrant
• Having more energy
• Living a longer and having a better quality of life

Improving your spirit can assist you in:

• Being more connected with the world
• Living without fear
• Experiencing life more "in the moment"

When you are operating at a place where you are living without fear, then you are better able to accomplish anything you want.  You will experience more abundance and more joy.  You become more generous and more concerned with helping others. This creates a chain reaction.  As you become a role model, you inspire others to grow.  Soon, they will follow your example and they too will become role models.

In the movie Pay it Forward , Trevor, played by Haley Joel Osment, comes up with a profound idea as part of a class project.  He proposes that you perform an act of kindness for another person without expecting any pay.  Instead, you ask them to pay it forward by doing a favor for at least 3 other people.  They, in turn, pay it forward to 3 more, creating  a global chain reaction of kindness.

When we improve ourselves, we learn to be more positive and as such, we make better decisions for ourselves and for others.  We embrace life without fear and we accept challenges rather than run from them.  We become more confident and we become better communicators.

Self-improvement isn’t about trying to be perfect, as that is an impossible task.  It’s definitely not about comparing yourself to others either.  We all have different gifts and aptitudes.  Therefore, comparing yourself to someone else is pointless.  There is one thing that you can do better than anybody else in the world; be yourself.  Self-improvement is about being the best version of yourself and being the best that you can be.

People who engage in self-improvement have made many great contributions to society.

By creating the best version of ourselves, we create a better life. We inspire others to do the same and this in turn has a positive cumulative effect on the entire world.

The topic of yesterday’s post was about the importance of having a positive attitude.  Here’s a short and beautiful video titled The Secret: Positive Thinking & Bringing Abundance to Your Life.

The type of attitude you possess depends entirely on you.  It can be either positive or negative.  The great thing is – you get to choose.  No one can make you feel a particular way because you must remember that you are in control of how you choose to feel.  When someone does or says something that you feel was meant to hurt you, that may or may not have been their intent.  Oftentimes, hurt feelings are simply a matter of misunderstanding.  Even if the person’s intent was malicious, you can simply choose not to let this affect you.

As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Remember, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent ."

One of my favorite movies is The Point of No Return starring Bridget Fonda, Gabriel Byrne, and Anne Bancroft.  The movie is a remake of La Femme Nikita and Bridget Fonda’s character, Maggie, is a lawbreaking criminal who chose to become a paid assassin in lieu of death by lethal injection.  She is very rough around the edges and as part of her training she receives etiquette lessons.  Her transformation is nothing short of remarkable.  In one scene, her coach for this endeavor, played by Anne Bancroft, gives her a tip on how to control her temper. She tells her that when something bad happens or a situation goes awry to simply smile and say something like, "I never did mind about the little things ".  This is one of my favorite movie quotes and I use it quite often.  It helps me to put things into perspective.

In the past, I used to let little things drive me crazy, and I must admit that sometimes I still do.  The difference is, now when I feel that happening, I try to make a conscious effort to choose a positive attitude.

There is much to be gained from having a positive attitude. Studies have shown that a positive attitude promotes better health. Projecting positivity helps with handling stress and we all know that our health is directly linked to how we cope with stress.

A positive attitude is a foundation you can build upon.  It would be quite difficult to be confident, outgoing, and enthusiastic without first having a positive attitude.  A positive attitude supports positive attributes; a negative attitude does not.  It’s pretty obvious why positive people have more friends than negative people.   If you first choose a positive attitude, other positives will follow.

In today’s fast paced, high tech society, we are bombarded with information.  Many of us are experiencing information overload. Between e-mails, snail mail, text mail, billboards, newspapers, and magazines, advertisers are all competing for our attention.  Then there’s the news, which is almost always negative.  Thousands of positive things occur every single day, but the media focuses on sharing mostly bad stuff.

So how do you stay positive amidst so much negativity?

1.  For starters, you can limit your news intake and consider your news sources very carefully.

2.  Do things that make you happy.  Watch funny movies, listen to your favorite music, spend time with people whose company you enjoy, or pursue a hobby.

3.  One of the easiest and best things you can do to keep a positive attitude is to think about everything in your life for which you are grateful.  Have an attitude of gratitude.

If you have a roof over your head, a bed to sleep in, food to eat, and are wearing clothing, then you should be grateful.  If you are able to read this message then you have the gift of sight and you should be grateful.  If someone is reading this to you, then you have the gift of hearing and again, you should be grateful.  If you are reading this on a computer that you own, then by most of the world’s standards, you are quite wealthy and you should be grateful.

We take so many things for granted and in doing so we allow negativity to creep in to our lives.  If you start paying attention to the gifts you already have and begin each day by giving thanks, it’s easy to have a positive attitude.

Welcome to The Metamorphosis Café. As this is my very first post, I thought it would be appropriate to explain the reason I’ve decided to launch this blog.
When I first saw the movie, The Secret, the concepts were exciting and refreshing yet very unfamiliar. The messages contained throughout the movie resonated with me profoundly and I knew I wanted to learn more. Just imagine, being able to manifest your dreams and have all the things in life you desire! I’ve always been interested in becoming a better person.

"Armed with the knowledge that our thoughts create our reality, I feel empowered me to become the best person I can be."

Helping others has always given me a great sense of personal satisfaction. Self- Improvement and Personal Development are things I’m very passionate about. While I’ve always enjoyed writing, I’ve never given any serious thought to doing anything with it. As I began implementing visualization techniques in my own life, it occurred to me that I could use writing as an instrument to help others grow as human beings to realize their potential.

We live in times of uncertainty and it’s easy to get caught up in fearful and negative thinking. I’ve certainly done my share of negative thinking in the past. Sometimes we develop habitual thinking patterns and we aren’t even aware that we’re being negative or fearful. I now understand how harmful this type of thinking is as it only perpetuates more of the same. To achieve our dreams we need to break free from negativity and fearfulness, and instead, focus on the abundance that we deserve and desire.

I want to share the things I’ve learned and will continue to learn about Personal Development. It’s my great desire that by doing so I can help you to become the person you want to be and achieve your heart’s desires. However, my purpose for writing this blog isn’t completely unselfish. Researching and writing is not only a great way for me to share my thoughts, it’s also a great way for me to learn as well.

If everyone were to practice self-improvement by becoming a better version of themselves, imagine the positive effect this would have on the world! I’m enjoying a fantastic voyage while creating the life of my dreams. I am a student of personal development and manifestation and I will consider it an honor, should you decide to join me on the journey.